Songket fever is a disease endemic to the island of Lombok, Indonesia. Here are its symptoms, drawn from personal experience:
You see beautiful, fascinating, multicoloured patterns everywhere.
They seem alive; they are alive!
You spend all your money acquiring said patterns.
The thought of letting them out of your sight, unbearable.
Sympathising with your plight, women smile at you meekly, while spinning their yarns.
As for malaria, there is no cure; you have no choice but to leave the island, or succumb.
